Your Choice to Join

College is not necessarily for learning, but for networking or connecting with people in your chosen field.

Why do I say this: that college is not about learning? Because, in my experience, field-specific vocabulary or text-book procedures are often useless in real-world scenarios. Most companies and organizations offer their own processes which cannot be taught from a book, but must be learned through experience. Further elaboration on that is necessary, I think, but I believe I shall save this for a later post.

For now, I would like to focus on college as a way to network and connect with others. More specifically, on sororities and fraternities. And even more specifically, on my previous disdain for such organizations. I say “previous disdain” because, I believe that I now better-understand the purpose behind joining.

When I was an undergrad, I had absolutely no interest in joining a sorority. As far as I could see, sorority girls did not benefit anyone but themselves and their sisters: nothing but a group of “party girls,” a “flock of hoes.” Such a view, I now understand, is judgmental, cruel, and unfair.

I ask for forgiveness.

I was younger then, and I didn’t care for the reason behind people joining those organizations, but that does not make my mindset acceptable. I apologize.

Looking back, I do not regret my decision to not join a sorority. What I do regret is that I didn’t take the time to understand them: those men and women who found comfort and belonging in their chosen chapter – the same sensation that I now experience because of my DAR chapter.

Where did this come from? Why now do I suddenly feel the need to reevaluate my opinion on sororities? Because of a bathroom discussion I overheard.

The words were meaningless, the topics unimportant, but the passion behind the words and topics was so eerily similar to how I speak of my chapter that I was forced to reconsider my predisposition to dislike sororities, fraternities, and those who are members of them.

I began searching for information on sororities (and by default, fraternities) for why someone would want to join: the positives vs. the negatives. Through a postgraduate paper by EJ Wolber-Wood, I came to see that joining a sorority or fraternity involved a large time commitment, added financial obligation, and strict GPA requirements – much like my own DAR chapter.

I started comparing myself to his interviewees:
Where I became more involved in the community, they became more involved in school activities.
Where I found myself supporting patriotism, they found themselves supporting school spirit and morale.
Where I found myself – who I was, they found themselves – who they were.

Though different, we are the same.

I failed to see this before.

I failed to understand, and so, may have potentially failed my peers. Regardless, the past is the past. Going forward, I intend to look at these men and women as equals. Their choice is their own, and if they feel about their chapter in the same way that I feel about mine, then I say, “go do that voodoo that you do.” We are one, we are many, and we are free.

Please share!
Help others to see the importance of belonging to
something greater than themselves!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s